Diary of an Amish Man - The Amish Outlaws

(Brothers and Sisters. We are trying something new with the Diary of an Amish Man. We are going to turn the proverbial pen over to some of the other brothers in an attempt to give you a different insight into our weird little world. This week, Brother Hezekiah X is at the helm. Please note that Hez isn’t very adept on the computer. We have left his writing intact, flubs and all as, well... it’s part of his charm.)

Tuesday, November 11th, 2008

Hi I'm hezekiah.I would like to dispel some of the rumors that have been going on around the water cooler these days.

1) I'm not dating Oprah actually she's using me for sex and I'm using her for money.

2)Ishmael doesn't have the biggest Penis in the band .He has the biggest Penis in the world.

Now that I got that out of the way I wanted to tell you about the weekend that just passed this is your backstage pass into the world of the Amish Outlaws.or is it? On Fri morning myself and Zeke and Abel rolled out of bed and headed down to Bel air Maryland . With a population of 9948 and a government surplus on 80 million dollars these people know how to party on a budget .The club we played the Looney Bin is apply named. 6 or 700 of the craziest drunks you've ever seen. (my kinda people) and at least 70% female I like those odds. This is the kind of place where girls drink straight whiskey and are constantly sending more and more shots up to the band .You god damn people your making me into an alcoholic.

The crowd at Looney’s. No, that guy isn’t blowing a bubble.
That’s one of those ghost orbs they talk about on that Ghost Hunter TV show.

The next morning we got up and and drove to Cromwell Connecticut .This town, its a crazy town, its a cooky town when you go downtown(picture Sinatra singing that last sentence) The club rookies is a sports fans wet dream, hundreds of giant screen tv's with every game known to man on.Also allot of lovely young women trying to distract there man from the game he's watching .(most of the time they succeed). This is a music lovers place as well as a great moving an shaking dance floor they pretty much like every style of music especially the classic rock .When Big Daddy did styx's "come sail away" the whole place was singing that's the type of stuff musicians dream about.Well thanks for listening to my B.S. May god bless you and keep you.

Good times at Rookies. No, Hez isn’t touching that girl’s behind. It is just raised up in the air.

Thanx,

Hez

Click here for past diary entries

_______________________________________________________

Click here to book The Amish Outlaws.

for info and quilt patterns, contact us.